Signs You're Gaslighting Yourself
September 18, 2024
Gaslighting isn't just something others do to you—it can be something you do to yourself too. Like where can we catch a break! So, I am here to save you the worrying and give you a quick rundown of signs that you might be messing with your own head:
1. Distrusting Your Own Judgment
Source: Tiny Buddha
You might find that you are constantly second-guessing yourself or dismissing your gut feelings as irrational. This self-doubt can lead you to ignore your instincts and insights, which are often correct or at least worth considering!
2. Believing You're Overly Sensitive
Source: Inc.
If you often tell yourself that you're "too sensitive" or "overreacting," you might be undermining your own emotions. Feeling ashamed of being emotional or sensitive is a sign that you're invalidating your own feelings, which is a form of self-gaslighting. Tune into your emotions and allow yourself to feel.
3. Minimizing Your Feelings
Source: Psychology Spot
Saying things like "It's not a big deal," "Others have it worse," or "I'm overreacting," are ways you might minimize your feelings and experiences. This can stop you from addressing your feelings or seeking help when you need it. If you feel something is a big deal, you should just consider that it just might in fact be a big deal.
4. 'Shoulding' Yourself
Source: Tiny Buddha
Frequent thoughts of what you "should" feel or do, like "I shouldn’t feel this way" or "I should just be positive," can show that you're setting unrealistic standards for yourself based on what you think others expect from you, rather than what is truly beneficial for your mental health.
5. Making Excuses for Others' Behavior
Source: Domesticshelters.org
If you find yourself rationalizing someone else’s harmful behaviour and blaming yourself instead (e.g., "It's because I provoked them"), you may be gaslighting yourself by refusing to see the situation clearly and protecting others at your own expense.
Wow, I don't know about you guys but I find myself doing a lot of these things. Realizing you’re doing this to yourself is step one. From there, it’s about giving yourself a break and starting to trust your thoughts and feelings more. You deserve it! I need to work on this myself too!
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